A few months ago, I had a round of these conversations with the usual suspects in my life. Think of it as a dick Overton window: a continuum of acceptability, but in this case, one that varies from person to person. Boyfriend dicks have a measurable component, of course, but not a consistent one. Vaginas vary in depth and sensitivity just like penises vary in length and shape, and where some women may enjoy the mix of pleasure and pain she gets when someone hung repeatedly bashes into her cervix, others want nothing to do with it.
Good dick causes temporary insanity in some women. Your dummy called you 10 times in a row and left 4 voice messages— my dummy called 22 times and then sent 32 text messages. Yes, ladies. We guys laugh at your silly asses way before we feel bad about ghosting you or breaking your heart. The thing that frustrates me is that women continue to play the role of comic relief knowing that acting out will always be in vain. In the history of the world there has never been a case of psychotic behavior being used to make a person fall in love. So many women claim to have no fucks to give or to be above chasing a man, yet the vast majority do get sprung and become psychotic Dickchotic.
Whenever I receive one now I send back a pic of the hugest, veiniest one-eyed monster I can find as my reply. Like, the equivalent in the s would have been just pulling your dick out in the middle of a conversation with a woman aka flashing them. People used to get arrested for that. First guys stop opening doors for women then they send sleepy ass pictures of their dicks.
I know I'm not supposed to send dick pics. At least that's what everyone's advising post-Weinergate. But what if a girl I'm seeing wants a dick pic?